Hubble Deep Field

Hubble Deep Field Image - This view of nearly 10,000 galaxies is the deepest visible-light image of the cosmos. The image required 800 exposures taken over the course of 400 Hubble orbits around Earth. The total amount of exposure time was 11.3 days, taken between Sept. 24, 2003 and Jan. 16, 2004. (NASA, ESA, S. Beckwith (STScI) and the HUDF Team).

When she said the words deep field, I welled up - suddenly ware of what I was missing - stuck with how essential the union with mystical divinity is for me. She spoke of deep galactic events - stars forming and stars dying - and how just through the surprise passing of one galaxy with another - that whiff of relationship - that little high five from another can lead to more creation events even when everything is dying.

That’s what I want.

A creation event.

Right here inside me - inside this galactic country of flesh, nerves and bones - when the red stars have breathed their last and the blue healthy ones seem light years away.

During this time I pine for other old lights from early night skies - woman who burned brightly, times of success and of no fear in my life. That is not this time and for the dense gases that must fire my new starlings, it comes from a hidden part of new life-making stored deep in me - or its not there at all.

At the mercy of life - grief and love are the hands that hold the many necessary passing’s of cosmic importance. From the death of these old stars - star dust - comes the matter for shaping the new. Life forms that I don’t know exist waiting to well up, take form and burst forward.